It's a Side Effect!
by BrokenxStars
Summary: Hehehe. XD I've got a plot for this story! So, Tir's got a new plan to get Zim and Dib together, but is it going to work out? Chapter 4 is up! IT'S OVER. xDD Weird ending. Mmmyep. I'M SORRY. IT'S FIXED NOW. XD
1. It's A Side Effect!

I haven't gotten any more reviews for my 'Switching Interests' story, or my 'Up in the Clouds' story, so I'm going to be writing these 'mini stories' until I get reviews on the others to finish them. Ok? Ok.

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Tir skipped down the street, but stopped at the edge of it. She stared down at the water, her eyes wide. Her head turned to see Zim run down the street, flailing his arms around wildly. Dib was following him, a water balloon in one hand and handcuffs in the other. Tir blinked and stepped back when Zim ran past her and same with Dib. Tir grabbed Dib's collar though, making him stop and slightly choke.

"Hey Dibby!" Tir said and smiled, her tongue sticking out cutely. "Go away, Tir! I'm trying to catch the ALIEN!" Dib yelled and pointed at Zim. Zim stopped and turned around, his hands on his hips. He stared at the human and smiled. "Lies! I am _human_! Perhaps YOU are the alien! I mean, you _do _have a big head." Zim said and snickered. Dib glared and growled from ANGER. "I don't have a big head!" Dib screeched. Zim just laughed and laughed and laughed. And laughed.

"Hahaha, pathetic humans…" Zim said and shook his head. Dib waved his arms in the air, still slightly choking from Tir. "You come over here and say that to my face, space boy!" Dib yelled. Zim just laughed at Dib's pathetic-ness. Dib didn't glare or anything, he just sat there, his arms crossed.

"Well? Aren't you going to come over here?" Dib asked, feeling very superior right now. Zim stopped laughing and just stared at Dib then at the water balloon and then at the handcuffs. "Drop your weapons, earth monkey." Zim commanded and Dib rose his eyebrow and smirked. "What? Don't trust me?" Dib asked.

Tir just stood there, staring at Dib and then at Zim. She had a plan. Oh what a beautiful plan it was.

"No, because every human is a filthy dirty lying…pork-filled flower!" Zim yelled and waved his hands in the air. Dib blinked then yelled, "We're not flowers, liars, pork-filled, filthy or dirty!" Apparently, Dib was referring to Tir and himself. Tir just stood there stupidly, and then she blinked and looked at Zim. "Uhh- Yeah!" Tir yelled and nodded proudly. Zim glared and took one step forward, but stopped. He rose an 'eyebrow' and stared at Dib. Then he took another step, and another, and another, and another, and another…Trust me, kids, it's a long way. So, after so many 'another's' Zim finally made it to Dib. Zim stood infront of him, and Dib glared. They both glared at eachother.

Oh yeah, if you're wondering about the weapons, they were on the ground. Dib finally dropped them because they hurt his arms.

Anyway, they stared/glared at each other then Zim blinked. "What did I come here for again?" Zim asked and Dib opened his mouth and closed it quickly. "Uhh- I don't know." Dib said and stared at Zim then looked at Tir. Tir gasped and raised her free hand in the air. "MY PLAN!"

"Your plan?" Dib said and looked at her. Zim stared at her and then lowered one of his eyes(whatever. xD). "Eh?" Zim mumbled. Tir grabbed Zim's collar with her other hand and lifted them both up.

"BY THE POWER INVESTED IN ME, I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU-" Tir stopped and thought about it for a moment. Zim screeched and squiggled, trying to break free of Tir's grip. Dib's eyes widened when he realized what she was saying.

"Oh no! OoOooh no!" Dib said and put his hands in front of himself, like to block of Zim. "I am _not _doing that!" Dib said and waved his hands. Zim looked at Dib and stopped squiggling. "What? What are we going to do? TELL ZIM!" Zim commanded and raised his arms in the air.

Tir smiled and squeaked as she started to move Dib and Zim towards each other. "- Uhh, alien and Dib! You may now kiss the green skinned thing!" Tir said and squished their bodies together into a kiss. Dib's eyes widened and Zim screamed. Zim stared waving his hands, like scratching the air or trying to find something to pull so he could get out of this situation. Once Tir separated them, Dib was covered in scratches and Zim was holding his stomach.

"Awww, you're such a cute couple!" Tir said and smiled. Dib looked down at her and glared. "I hate you." Dib said and Zim just closed his eyes and started to scream again. "EVIL EARTH GERMS! THEY'RE GOING TO EAT ME ALIVE!" Zim screamed. Tir dropped Zim, so he plopped onto the ground and ran off screaming and cursing and yelling at Tir and Dib.

Tir held onto Dib though, holding him above the ground. "Uhh, aren't you going to let me go now?" Dib asked and smiled hopefully. "I really want to go home and throw up. I don't feel too well." Dib said and held his stomach with a fake smile on. Dib really did feel sick.

"That's just the side effect of a kiss. Don't worry." Tir said and smiled at him. Dib glared and twitched. "NO! THAT'S NOT A SIDE EFFECT OF A KISS-"

"What about love?" Tir interrupted and smiled.

"- OR LOVE –"

"What about denying love?" Tir interrupted yet again and smiled more.

"- OR DENYING LOVE –"

"What about-"

"IT'S A SIDE EFFECT OF BEING KISSED BY SOMEONE YOU HATE WITH ALL YOUR GUTS! Now, I want to go home." Dib yelled and took a deep breath. Tir stared at him then frowned. "Oh, ok." Tir mumbled and threw Dib all the way to his house.

The next day, Dib and Zim stayed home from school. Why? They felt sick. Why? Because it's a side-effect of being kissed by someone you hate with all your guts or squiggly spooch. Yup.


	2. At Dib's House

BY POPULAR DEMAND ( Not really. xD ) I am updating this story with a new chapter, even though it's short.

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The school day was a quiet one as Dib and Zim were in their houses and possibly feeling sick. Ok, they _were _feeling sick, but for what reason? They kissed. 

"Why're you suddenly sick, son?" Professor Membrane asked earlier that morning. Dib just held his stomach and groaned, not wanting to talk about it. Professor Membrane shrugged and walked off, shaking his head sadly while mumbling, "My poor insane, sick, not-talking son."

Meanwhile, at Zim's house, Zim wasn't feeling all that well either. Zim was laying on his couch, his whole body heating up, and feeling very…very bad. Gir kept giving him tacos and squeaky moose, but it never helped.

Tir kept running to Zim's house, then Dib's house, then Zim's house then finally stopped at Dib's house. She popped up at his window, a smile on her face.

"Dibby!" Tir yelled and Dib just popped his head up and looked at her. Dib groaned and hid under his blanket. "What's the matter?"

"What do you mean 'what's the matter?'? You know darn well what's the matter!" Dib yelled and groaned again. Tir frowned and tilted her head to the side.

"It's because of Zim, isn't it? Hiding your feelings isn't good." Tir said and shook her head. Dib looked at her and glared. Tir could FEEEEL the hatred Dib had for Zim, but Tir looked past that and saw the love Dib had. Tir squeaked and broke through the window.

"Dibby, don't worry! I'm going to make it all better by bringing Zim over here. Ok?" Tir said, thinking this was the right thing to say. Instead, Dib just moaned and hugged his stomach. Tir frowned and poked Dib's head. "Dibby? What's wrong? I thought you liked Zim and I thought you told me to do that." Tir said and frowned. Dib just stared at her, his eyes wide and confused. Tir smiled and explained,

"See, about a week ago, you came over to my house and told me EVERYTHING. About your feelings for Zim, about how you've dreamed about him and such! You even explained your plan." Tir took a deep breath and sighed. She then nodded and smiled again.

Dib's eyes widened and he looked even sicker. "ARE YOU FRIKKING NUTS! I would NEVER do that! Dear GOD!" Dib yelled and held his mouth to hold back vomit. Tir just shook her head and snickered.

"Dib, you _did _do that, admit it!" Tir said and looked at him. Dib just stared then turned around, closing his eyes.

"Go away." Dib mumbled and held his stomach again. Tir shrugged and ran out the window and off to Zim's house.

Her plan was working.


	3. BESTESTEST FRIENDS

Tir sprinted off to Zim's house, a smile on her face. Now, to tell Zim about what HE did.

Zim twitched as he slept, drool coming from his mouth. He was asleep, thankfully for him. Irkens never slept, but when they're sick they need tons of sleep to 'recharge' but it's often hard to sleep. Tir ran over to the house and stopped at the door and knocked. Gir screamed, which made Zim half wake up and look around, but fell back asleep. Gir ran over to the door and opened it, his eyes wide.

"Master's SLEEPING, so SHHHH!" Gir said and put his fingers to his mouth. Tir bent down then pushed a button on her arm. Her disguise changed and she was in her Irken form.

"I'm Zim's bestestest friend, so I need to see him! DO YOU SEE MY IRKEN-NESS? I AM ZIM'S KIND!" Tir yelled and pointed to her curly antennas. Gir just stared then nodded, his eyes still wide.

"I understand." Gir said in a spooky-like way. Tir looked at him then ran inside the house. Gir slowly shut the door in a creepy way. Tir chuckled nervously and snuck over to Zim. It was the PERFECT time to take part of her plan! "OH NO!" Tir heard Gir yell and she turned around to see the robot crawl around on the floor.

"M-My contacts! WHERE ARE THEY? I NEED THEM! They're made of BURRITOS! I want burritos!" Gir yelled and crawled around on the floor still, pawing the ground. He then stood up and ran into the kitchen screaming. Tir blinked and stared at the kitchen for a while then looked back at Zim, a smile on her face.

Tir lightly put her hand on Zim's shoulder, but he bat it away and turned around, mumbling something like 'I'll rule the world!' and stuff. Tir growled and shook her head. She took a deep breath and remembered why she was doing this.

To get Dib and Zim together! And to accomplish that, she must make Zim believe stuff. Tir grabbed Zim's shoulders and shook them. He looked around and his PAK 'zapped' a little. Tir took a step back, waving her hands infront of her.

"Zim! I know you like Dib, so tell him at school tomorrow! Tell him…Tell him….Tell him…." Tir said and whispered as she stepped back, her hands still infront of her. She then kept whispering 'Tell him…Tell him…" as she walked out the door. She then closed it and leaned against it, sighing. She put her disguise back on with her SUPER MAGIC ARM.

Gir ran over to the door and opened it, making Tir fall in. Gir stared down at her and smiled. "I made CHICKEN! I like chicken. I also like Tacos. I wish I could spell Tacos but I can't, because it's hard." Gir said and frowned. Tir just nodded and got up, then staring down at the little robot.

A moment of silence.

Gir started to dance, which got Tir in the mood to dance because she was happy because her PLAN WAS GOING TO WORK.

So everybody get down and dance! MOVE YO' BUM. :dances:


	4. The Ending Of Doom! With Pain!

After all that horribly disturbing dancing, Tir walked home, this was conveniently next to the next door neighbor of Zim.

Tir walked up to the door and opened it, to see the smiling face of her S.I.R unit, Sandwich. Sandwich saluted Tir and walked away. Tir frowned and walked over to a chair. "I like it more when you're stupid, Sandwich." Tir mumbled and looked at the little robot, who was wiping off some drawing on the wall.

The S.I.R. unit looked over at her master and saluted her. "Do you want me to become stupid, Master?" Sandwich asked. Tir's reply was a simple nod, and that's all that it took. Sandwich ran over to a wall and slammed her head against it. Some mechanical sounds could be heard and Sandwich popped up with a, "HEYA, MASTER!" This brought a smile to Tir's face.

"Hey, Sandwich! Guess what I did today?" Tir said and put her hand on her knee, her eyes wide. The little robot's eyes widened( If they can.) and she put her hands over her mouth. "Wat?" Sandwich whispered, anxious to know what her master did.

Tir looked around then raised her hands in the air. "I LIED TO DIB AND ZIM! When Zim and Dib go to skool tomorrow, FLUFF WILL HAPPEN! DO YOU HEAR ME? FLUUUFF!" Tir yelled and cackled. Sandwich started to giggle, then broke out in HYSTERICAL LAUGHS.

A small child that was walking up to the door, stopped and turned around, walking away. LATER, THAT CHILD'S HEAD EXPLODED.

The next day at skool, Zim walked down the street with a smug grin on his face. ( While the author is writing this, she is talking like Cartman. Myahhh. ) Dib walked down the other sidewalk, heading Zim's way. His eyes were wide. It looked as though he didn't get any sleep.

Right when they both got to school, they stared at eachother. Something in Zim's mind went _TINK! _Dib looked around then turned so that he could walk away and towards school. BUT HE WAS STOPPED BY ZIM.

"Apparently, the ALLMIGHTY ZIM loves you. Mmmyep." Zim said and nodded. Dib looked back and just stared, his eyes getting wide. In the background, there was a squeal from Tir.

Dib looked around and laughed. "You're funny, Zim. Haha, now let's go destroy eachother." Dib said and smiled a bit. Zim glared and grabbed the boy's shoulders.

"ZIM. LOVES. YOUUU." Zim screeched, which made Tir squeal even more.

For some reason, Dib's heart filled with MEAT JUICE, and his stomach was filled with KILLER BUTTERFLIES. Dib then started to mumble, "Maybe Tir was right, I mean, about the me loving Zim thing. It could work and stuff. AUGH, I'M SO CONFUSED." Zim just stared at him then looked aroung.

"Ehhh, I'm not really feelin' the love here. Soo, TELL ME YOU LOVE ZIM BACK, Yes?" Zim yelled and poked Dib's head as Dib continued to mumble. Dib just stared at him then smiled and held out his arms.

"Eh, alright. I LOVE YOUUU!" Dib yelled and tackled Zim. MANY SQUEALS COULD BE HEARD FROM TIR.

So the great cuddle-of-doom began with Dib and Zim. CUDDLE CUDDLE. Tir then jumped out and laughed. Dib and Zim looked over at her. She just LAUGHED AND LAUGHED.

"Hey, you guys wanna hear something funny?" Tir yelled, making Dib and Zim nod. "Well, Dib, I was lying about the whole thing! And Zim, I told you during your sleep to tell Dib you loved him! So it was all part of my plan and it WORKED! WHOO!" Tir explained and held up her hands, a smile on her face.

Dib and Zim both got up, they're eyes MYSTERIOUSLY glowing red. Tir laughed some more, a smile on her face. Dib and Zim started to walk towards Tir, while she was laughing.

Tir was later sent to a Hospital, where they never realized she was an alien.

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THE END. 


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